Parenting Baby to Sleep

 

Baby in a cot…tradition? But is it really tradition?

Some quotes and excerpts:

“…Co sleeping- or sleep sharing has been the norm in most cultures for thousands of years, in fact prior to the late 1700s co sleeping was the norm in all societies. It is only in the last 200 years that western society has decreed a baby should sleep alone….” for more of this article

“…Co-sleeping, also called the family bed, is a practice in which babies and young children sleep with one or both parents. It is standard practice in many parts of the world outside of North America, Europe and Australia, although even in these countries children a significant minority of children have shared a bed with their parents at some point in childhood. One 2006 study of children age 3-10 in India reported 93% of children co-sleeping. Co-sleeping was widely practiced in all areas up until the 19th century, until the advent of giving the child his or her own room and the crib. In many parts of the world, co-sleeping simply has the practical benefit of keeping the child warm at night. Co-sleeping has been relatively recently re-introduced into Western culture by practitioners of attachment parenting. A 2006 study of children in Kentucky in the United States reported 15% of infants and toddlers 2 weeks to 2 years engage in co-sleeping….” to see all of wiki’s page

“…Why do we not abandon cribs (cots), where many babies have died and many more have been injured? When babies die in cribs (cots), parents are never told to avoid them; we here only pleas for safer products. But when a baby dies in a bed, it draws calls for an end to co-sleeping, with little attention paid to the actual cause of that death (usually the result of an intoxicated parent, a water bed, or a gap between the mattress and the frame)….” an excerpt from Jan Hunts book “The natural child”.

In Australia and New Zealand one of the major causes of infant death is “Cot Death” or SIDS…see this video documentary.

A cultural view:

Why have we moved away from sleep sharing?

To start with we need to look back at our recent history of sleeping. It was thought that it was dangerous to share the same space as another (even your own partner) for fear of sharing our expelled air – which was thought to be poisonous. That’s why when we see the old romantic movies and read of old times we see the well to do in different rooms and the less well to do in different beds.

But these ideas really did hamper the “romance” of marriage and that “tradition” was soon lost for the convenience of sex.

But as sex became more of an importance and has been added to by flavors by books then movies it became more important to leave the children in another room (for their safety…?) for adults to share the romantic dream of the climax – as per advertised by our trashy romantic novels/movies.

We also have another part of history to look at too which added to our “modern ideas” back in the famine days of Catholic Ireland (and other countries) where we had many many children being born to already overflowing and stretched families with no contraception available/aloud….we had too many mouths to feed….we had starving families sleep sharing with their children (as there was nowhere else for them to sleep)….we have cases of desperation….and reports of new infants being “overlaid” and suffocated by accident…..

We had the Church ban sleep sharing.

So in looking at our recent history of 100-200 years we can see the influence of people born of this era of fear like Dr E. Holt (some other posts which mention Holt) or J. Sulzer who are then closely followed by our “modern” baby trainers who encourage parents to let their children cry it out and that children must sleep alone and in their own bed.

These people have based their parenting information on the “modern scientific idea” which came about back when scientific ideas were new exciting and the way of the future. Shaky times when scientists made bold statements which now days would not stand up to our modern terms (yes abet at times not strict enough) but still more so than back 100-200 years ago with the lack of research, studies and lets not forget our now current technology available which they didn’t have back then.

But do we think of this when we are encouraged as parents to sleep separately from our children? Who are we encouraged by? Are their reasons good and strong based on evidence?

Most information will be used and shared in fear not in informed decisions.

This post is written while thinking of the History or the Tradition of cot sleeping alone. It has not even looked at the human needs, the developmental side and even the safety side of infants sleeping alone…that is for another post.

To read more on this issue please visit the University of Notre Dame Mother Baby Sleep Laboratory

From a personal view:

It was not until we abandoned the “traditional” use of the cot altogether did we start getting some sleep. We are safe co-sleepers who have actually shared a bed with our baby daughter. We still co-sleep today with her at 2 years with her migrating to a co-sleeper cot beside our bed (her choice)….and right at this moment she is asleep in her own room in her own bed (her choice) though I’m sure I’ll have a little lump beside me in the cot in a few hours

Good night all and sleep well however YOU feel safe.